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Remember when you were nine, excited to reach double digits and eventually be a teenager? You would watch movies about kids in high school living the perfect life: dressing, talking, and acting a certain way. As a kid, I thought everything replicated those movies: the clothes, the social life, perfect grades—absolutely everything. On television, the teenage years are often depicted as a time of adventure, romance, and endless possibilities. The purpose of high school usually centers around romance, freedom, and self-discovery. It is not until we start our teenage years that we begin to realize that it is not what we exactly envisioned. 

Romantic relationships are a big focus of the “teenage dream,” leaving high school students with the expectation of experiencing intense, whirlwind romances that defy all odds. The idea of finding “the one” with fairytale endings despite all obstacles is a recurring motif in the media. However, real-life teenagers find that the teenage dream does not often meet their experiences. High school can be mundane as teenagers often get absorbed in schoolwork, extracurriculars, jobs, and social relationships. Something that movies do not often talk about is the balance between teenagers’ sense of identity and independence with their work lives and responsibilities. It is difficult to balance newfound independence as a teenager with the responsibilities of being a high schooler. Unlike the quick self-realization that characters undergo in movies, real life is complicated and nuanced in many ways.

The truth is, that teenage life is far more diverse and nuanced than the narrow lens through which it is portrayed in the media. In reality, teenagers navigate a myriad of social circles, friendships, and interests. The lines between real life and Hollywood are rigid—high school is not the same. 

While it is natural to be inspired by content we see in the media, it is important to realize that teenage life and the teenage dream are not the same. The teenage dream is just what it sounds like—a dream. Comparing your life to what you see in movies is often unhealthy because it can result in a toxic mindset and unhealthy standards. Movies often represent the idealized high school experience, but it is important to remember that everyone has their own unique teenage experience. While it is fun to tune into a cute teenage rom-com movie once in a while and escape reality, it is ultimately more rewarding to appreciate your teenage years.