As someone who loves to plan ahead, living in New Jersey makes that impossible. I try to pick out what to wear to school the night before but almost every morning I have to change my plans. When I expect it to be freezing cold in the middle of November, I end up wearing shorts. If you’re visiting in the summer, expect snow.

But it’s never the snow that slows me down. Without fail, whenever I am driving anywhere, I get stuck behind someone that drives 10 miles an hour yet manages to pretend they are in the movie Cars and swerve their car around like it’s the Piston Cup. Who needs coffee when you are playing the ‘guess when to brake game’ at the crack of dawn?

If you get lucky and don’t get stuck behind a terrible driver, check out the one and only “Saturday school”: the mall. I’ve never gone to the mall and not bumped into someone from school. I’m pretty sure that Menlo Park Mall has a personal Harry Potter conducting spells to transform Urban Outfitters into a JP Stevens hallway. Still, I don’t blame the students since there is not much to do in Jersey. If you’re bored, I recommend going to Chuck-E-Cheese instead of the mall. It’s fun, and at least you won’t see anyone you know there… unless your classmates are four years old.

Sick of seeing people you know? Head down to the Jersey shore if you want some fresh air. It’s a great workout if you bring any food, as the seagulls here are amazing at playing tag. Who goes to the beach to relax anyway? I definitely don’t, I go to play “fetch the doritos” with the seagulls who stole mine. It’s like an overpriced gym membership, since you pay fifty dollars just to set foot in our one-of-a-kind sand for a few hours. In fact, our sand is so unique it’s full of decorative Gatorade bottles and designer plastic bags.

If the beaches aren’t your thing, be sure to check out a local Dunkin Donuts. Especially if you cannot visit New York City, Dunkin is its cheaper twin since there’s always a line and a crowd of high school students served on the side with your drink. Don’t be shocked when you see a New Jersey native with a large iced coffee from Dunkin when it’s two degrees outside. It’s a necessity.

Jersey’s unique charm just can’t be replicated. Where else can you find the best diners and the worst drivers? I know that when I’m in college (and hopefully far, far away from Jersey) I’ll miss it—after all, there’s no place like home!